Alyssa's Worst Nightmare: They're Back
by SpazzyJuice
Summary: The two best friends are back after 4 years. Problem is Alyssa doesn't seem to remember them and she had never fought Lord Burroughs or any of the subordinates at all. Once again they help Alyssa on her journey. This is a re-write of the original story Alyssa's Nightmare: If You Give An Idiot A PS2. The old story will not be taken down. We've just thought we could do better! :
1. Hairy Love Child

It was a dark and stormy night...wait...hasn't this happened before? Indeed it has...

* * *

Retro was over Juice's house watching TV. "Dude. I'm sick of Ziggy losing every damn time!" Juice cried out to her friend who laughed at her.

"Cause he sucks. Derpy is where it's at!" Retro said grinning. Juice glared at her and threw her phone at Retro's head. Retro caught it with ease and looked at it. "You know...something is missing..."

"What?"

"Joe. It just seems so weird. He used to call all the time...pain in the ass he was bothering us while we were recording."

"Yup. Now he's six feet under. Only good thing that's happened these last couple of years. Give me the phone back." Retro gave her a blank stare.

"No."

"No?"

"Yeah. No. Hobag you tried to kill me with it!" Retro yelled standing up from the chair she was in. "You can have it back when you get down on your knees and apologize!"

"NEVAH!" Juice attacked Retro to the floor. The two girls rolled around on the floor until Juice hit her head on the TV stand. The impact caused a pile of games to fall on top of Juice. Only one landed in her lap. Juice shook her head and looked down. "Dude."

"Si?"

"We gotta play this!" Juice shouted holding up the game. The two girls began to giggle and took their places like they did four years ago. Then lightning struck.

"No..." Retro said holding the pillow close to her.

"It can't happen again. It was a onetime thing. Right? Right?" Then it happened.

* * *

It was not a happy Retro and Juice that sat on the edge of the cliff. Juice was throwing rocks trying to smash people's windows, and Retro was staring in abject confusion at their clothes. For this time it was Juice who was in pink, which was part of the reason the ginger's panties were in such a tight bunch. She wore a bright pink shirt that said "It's Not Showing Off" and on the back it said "If You Can Back It Up". She also wore black leggings under an asscape that said the same thing as her shirt and knee high white boots. She had on pink sunglasses to match.

Retro for some reason was wearing jean shorty-shorts with a clown face on one back pocket, and four aces on the other, with a red halter top that left her back all exposed. She had black lipstick with thin lines extending from the sides of her mouth and a thin black line over each eye. As they sat awaiting Alyssa, a song started. No not the Chopin song, a song that filled Juice with purest dread.

"I hear voices in my head! They counsi-"

"Hello?" asked Retro answering the phone in confusion.

"Retro? Hey it's Sami. Where are you, you sound really far away."

"Really far away is a _really _good assessment. Remember we told you about that thing that happens to us?"

"The lightning thing? Yeah."

"We are currently in WWII England waiting on a scrawny ginger brat we hate. Again." Retro ducked as Juice made a grab for the phone. "What?"

"The song. It must die. Like all of the trees."

"It's not even playing anymore! And it's our only link to our world moron." Juice thought for a minute.

"Oh yeah."

"So you're not at your house then?" asked Sami.

"No, but if it's your mom again just go over anyway. Tell my mom I sent you. We should be back in like 6 hours."

"Short game."

"Yeah. Plus we've been here before."

"Is Hunter at your house?"

"Oh my god yes Sami. Also ew."

"Hairy love child!" added Juice.

"No that's the kid I'm gonna have with-*click*" Retro rolled her eyes as she hung up.

Suddenly from behind them arose such a clatter. They sprang to their feet to see what was the matter. And there stood the girl they would both love to injure, their foe Alyssa, the annoying ginger.

"I wonder if she remembers us?" Juice asked as she watched Alyssa approach them.

"Well she should it's only four years. Besides who wouldn't remember _me_?" Retro said smirking. "I'm awesome." Juice rolled her eyes and huffed.

"Please help me! I just ran into this ghost and it almost killed me!" Alyssa yelled as she dropped to her knees. Retro and Juice looked at each other.

"You mean you don't remember us-"

"Me?" Retro said raising her eyebrow.

"No. I don't believe that I do. Besides," Alyssa looked up at them, "I'd think I remember you guys with the way you dress."

"I'll take that as a compliment!" Retro said smiling.

"So you've never seen us before? Oh what fun times we'll have..." Juice said as she began to stare off.

"Oh yes!" Retro began to jump up and down. "FUN TIMES! With Sledgie...nevermind..."

"What?" Alyssa asked tilting her head. Juice picked Alyssa up from the ground and sighed.

"Come on." Juice said dragging Alyssa towards the gate. "Let's go..."

"AGAIN!" Retro shouted with excitement skipping behind them.


	2. I'M WET

The girls entered Norton Tailors and began to search around on the 1st floor. Alyssa clutched onto Juice's asscape as Retro grabbed the bottle on the counter. "Here," she tossed the bottle over to Juice, "ginger is gonna need that." Juice handed the bottle to Alyssa. Alyssa opened the bottle and sniffed it.

"What is this?" Alyssa asked.

"Lavender you fool!" Juice roared tugging Alyssa off her asscape. "Come on lets go." Juice said going to the door on her left. Alyssa clung to Juice again as she opened the door.

"Yeah...I'm gonna stay right here..." Retro said going behind the curtain. "Have fun!" Retro closed the curtain and sat in the corner. "He never looks in here!"

"Who looks in there?" Alyssa asked Juice. Juice sighed.

"How about this. You go in this room read the newspaper then all your questions will be answered," Juice said pushing Alyssa into the back room and closed the door. Juice jumped behind the curtain as well. "He better not pull any smart shit this time. I swear-" Alyssa's screams from the other room.

"...was that faster than it should have bee-" The screaming grew steadily louder as Alyssa came barreling into the room and shot behind the curtain where she crouched shaking. The door had barely shut before it slammed open again, allowing Sledgehammer to enter. Only, the girls realized with increasing dread that was most assuredly NOT a sledgehammer he held now. He looked all over the room seeming to glance right past them once again.

"Alyssa!" The girls stood completely still as he stalked angrily around the room. "Alyssa! Randy!" There was a pause, and suddenly Retro shot out, neither noticing nor caring that the curtain ripped off behind her leaving the other two exposed.

"You remember me! He remembers me! You remember me! HA! I KNEW that only a fool could forget me! I'm far too amazing to be forgotten." Sledgehammer, Alyssa, and Juice all gaped at her. "Juice?"

"Yeah?"

"Hide Alyssa."

"Yeah good idea. Bye!" The jocky girl grabbed Alyssa and took off upstairs like a bat outta hell. Retro stared at Sledgie a moment longer.

"I should run now?" He shrugged. She took off out the front door as quickly as her legs could carry her hoping Juice and Alyssa made it to May's room.

* * *

"What do you MEAN you didn't grab the key!?"

"I didn't even know there WAS a key! You two seem to know what's going on, but you don't tell me anything!"

"Now get your skinny ass down there and get the damn key!"

"I'm not going down alone!" Juice groaned and grabbed the poker from the fire place.

"Yes. You are!" Juice poked Alyssa with the poker sending running out of the room. "It's in the red drawer!" Juice dropped the poker and plopped onto the bed. "Time to take a nap!"

* * *

**15 minutes later...**

Retro sat on the fountain ledge humming the Batman theme when she saw Alyssa jogging towards her. "Alyssa?"

"Yeah. I found this invitation in May's room so I'd figure you'd be here since you know what's going on." Retro's jaw dropped.

"You mean to tell me that you figured that out on your own?" Alyssa nodded. Retro shrugged. "Wait. WHERE'S JUICE!?"

"I don't know-"

"OH GOD! I LOST MY JUICE! No...YOU LOST MY JUICE!" Retro grabbed Alyssa by the neck and began to shake her. "HOW DARE YOU! I COULD KILL YOU!"

"RANDY!" Sledgehammer cried coming out from behind the bushes. "I found other Randy sleeping." Retro dropped Alyssa.

"Of course you did." Sledgehammer had Juice over his shoulder. You could hear loud snoring coming from the buff ginger. "I'll take her. Just..." Retro looked over to the fountain. "Put her in there." She pointed to the fountain. Sledgehammer complied and threw Juice into the fountain. Juice sprung out from the water.

"I'M WET!" Juice yelled. "I'M HYSTERICAL AND I'M WET!" Retro slapped her. "I'm in pain...I'M IN PAIN! I'M WET AND I'M STILL HYSTERICAL!"

"What were you doing sleeping!?"

"Well the bed looked comfy and I didn't sleep on it..." Juice collapsed into the water. Retro looked in the water and found Juice fast asleep...again. As Retro growled Alyssa pulled herself off the ground. Sledgehammer seemed to notice her for the first time and chased her towards the concert hall. Retro watched them for a moment before turning back to the sleeping ginger. Rolling her eyes, Retro grabbed her by her asscape and pulled her toward the hall.


End file.
